I love writing. It’s the reason I’ve written countless stories ever since I was a kid. But there are many times that it’s just frustrating.
Such as this morning. I try to get up at 5:00am to have an hour of writing time before work at the day job. Sometimes I can’t manage to roll out of bed that early, but many times I do. I try to write as much as I can during that time.
Clearly, this morning is not one of those times, judging from the fact that I’m writing a blog entry at 5:29AM instead of working on the first draft I’ve been writing for the last few weeks. I write during my lunch hour on my little netbook and I’m not connected to the internet on it, so I have no distractions available to me. It’s been working. I’ve been consistently writing over 1,000 words a day during each session for the last few weeks. I’m 41,000 words into my goal of at least 60,000. So I sat down today at my desktop computer and everything just feels blah.
It’s a first draft and it’s not supposed to be a good. I’m trying to remind myself of that. I don’t know if it’s just the distraction of the internet available to me on this computer or what, but I just cannot focus. Maybe this book won’t be good, maybe I’ll throw it all out, but I should at least try to finish it and then figure out what kind of a mess it is later, right? My mind is jumping from one idea to another, from this draft to the Troy High novella I have planned to the two entirely new ideas that came to me yesterday, unable to pinpoint any one thing in particular.
I love writing. I just don’t love the days when I can’t focus and when everything I write feels terrible.